More Than A Handful ✉️

Posted: May 17, 2014 in ✉️ To whom it may concern

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To whom it may concern,

My wife and I were watching the film Total Recall last night. In the film there is a very famous scene that involves a women who has three breast. Please could you help to settle an argument that two of us got into whilst viewing the film.

Would it be possible to attach a third breast in the middle of a womens two existing breast without a natural breast plate. My wife belives it would be impossible but I am far more optimitic.

Please help to settle the feud.

I look forward to your response.

Regards,

Sebastian Bowen.

Plastic Surgeons Response

Dear Sebastian,

I wouldn’t normally respond to unusual queries but I’d hate to allow a feud to rage…

Clearly, it’s hard to imagine the scenario where this would be anything but hypothetical but here goes…

It would be technically possible to attach a third breast using microsurgical techniques. The main problem would be finding a donor and the drug immunosuppression that would be required (much like an organ transplant) afterwards. The problem would not be the surgery but the potential side effects of this drug treatment.

Hope this helps domestic bliss to return…

Regards,

Stephen Hamilton

Consultant Plastic and Reconstructive Surgeon

My Response

Dear Stephen,

Firstly thank you for taking the time to respond to me.

There are circumstances in life that this would be entirely plausible and beneficial. One that comes to mind off the top of my head is the porn industry. A third breast on any women in that industry would be a goldmine. Imagine the possibilities.

According to your email it sounds like the side effects from the drugs would be the main problem. However if a suitable donor could be found and the side effects could be reduced, how long would it take to perform such a procedure? How much would it cost? And finally how long would it take for my wife to recover? Hypothetically of course.

I look forward to your response,

Regards

Sebastian Bowen.

Stephen Did Not Respond

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